What in the world does that even mean? It's been quite a while since I've had what I would call a physical home. Maybe it was the house we bought in Murphysboro, IL. The little white bungalow with a garden that I willed to grow and paint colors that I chose and hand-me-down furniture that truly fit who we were. I guess that would be it.
As I hang out here in Delhi for one more night -- look for the blog about that later, maybe -- I'm getting so ready to hop on a plane. But why? So I can be home. Ooops, I mean so I can see the new place that we will call home that I've never seen before but all my stuff is apparently thrown into. Let me recap:
Our area had horrific flooding a few short weeks ago and will be recovering for a long time. (If you want to know more about that, message or email me or something). Think Katrina with much worse infrastructure and you're getting close. Our new home -- you know, the one with the perfect mountain view and the amazing neighbors and beautiful flowery yard and plenty of room for the family? -- was up on a hill. We were fine! Praise God! But, our landlords weren't so blessed. Their home was in the valley and is covered in mud inside and out. Their daughter's house collapsed. They are safe, but need a place to live. Hence, we move yet again. I happened to be in Delhi visiting a friend when all this happened. Chris sent me the kids and then he helped with relief work and moved our whole house before he joined me. Now we're getting ready to go back. We are still in our old neighborhood and the house we're moving to actually is bigger with a bigger yard -- though not as pretty or with as good of a view. Still, though, I've never seen the inside and I'm longing to go there. I'm longing to settle into it and try to make it a home. Sometimes I ask myself: Why do you try?
Really, though. Since leaving Murphysboro, we've been living with family, living in houses we share with other families, living out of hotel rooms and suitcases, and spending less than 5 months at a time in one place. We did have quite a few months in our flat in our old city, but it never quite felt like home to me since we took several long stints out and had so much transition while we were there. So, I was so excited to finally be putting down some roots in a beautiful home that I loved with people who were great. Now, I have to get excited once more.
I'm so darn familiar with transition stress. The flipping between enthusiasm for a new start and exhaustion from all the changes. The unpacking and looking for a new place for everything. The months it takes to acquire things here to make living possible and relatively comfortable. The tantrums, sassy words, breakdowns when the kids (or let's be real, sometimes me) can't take another thing not being in their control. The frustration with the new situation mixed with absolute elation when something is better than expected. The giving it up to God that must take place. The relief when He takes it. The amazement that His grace was enough yet again.
So, here we go again. Home Sweet Home. Like I've been reminding our kids. Home is where our family is together. Even in a hotel room. Jed prayed and thanked God for the one we're in tonight. He also asks God when Jesus will come back so we can all be in heaven together and see His face. "Cause that's going to be the best, right Mama?" Right Buddy! Home Sweet Home.
As I hang out here in Delhi for one more night -- look for the blog about that later, maybe -- I'm getting so ready to hop on a plane. But why? So I can be home. Ooops, I mean so I can see the new place that we will call home that I've never seen before but all my stuff is apparently thrown into. Let me recap:
Our area had horrific flooding a few short weeks ago and will be recovering for a long time. (If you want to know more about that, message or email me or something). Think Katrina with much worse infrastructure and you're getting close. Our new home -- you know, the one with the perfect mountain view and the amazing neighbors and beautiful flowery yard and plenty of room for the family? -- was up on a hill. We were fine! Praise God! But, our landlords weren't so blessed. Their home was in the valley and is covered in mud inside and out. Their daughter's house collapsed. They are safe, but need a place to live. Hence, we move yet again. I happened to be in Delhi visiting a friend when all this happened. Chris sent me the kids and then he helped with relief work and moved our whole house before he joined me. Now we're getting ready to go back. We are still in our old neighborhood and the house we're moving to actually is bigger with a bigger yard -- though not as pretty or with as good of a view. Still, though, I've never seen the inside and I'm longing to go there. I'm longing to settle into it and try to make it a home. Sometimes I ask myself: Why do you try?
Really, though. Since leaving Murphysboro, we've been living with family, living in houses we share with other families, living out of hotel rooms and suitcases, and spending less than 5 months at a time in one place. We did have quite a few months in our flat in our old city, but it never quite felt like home to me since we took several long stints out and had so much transition while we were there. So, I was so excited to finally be putting down some roots in a beautiful home that I loved with people who were great. Now, I have to get excited once more.
I'm so darn familiar with transition stress. The flipping between enthusiasm for a new start and exhaustion from all the changes. The unpacking and looking for a new place for everything. The months it takes to acquire things here to make living possible and relatively comfortable. The tantrums, sassy words, breakdowns when the kids (or let's be real, sometimes me) can't take another thing not being in their control. The frustration with the new situation mixed with absolute elation when something is better than expected. The giving it up to God that must take place. The relief when He takes it. The amazement that His grace was enough yet again.
So, here we go again. Home Sweet Home. Like I've been reminding our kids. Home is where our family is together. Even in a hotel room. Jed prayed and thanked God for the one we're in tonight. He also asks God when Jesus will come back so we can all be in heaven together and see His face. "Cause that's going to be the best, right Mama?" Right Buddy! Home Sweet Home.
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